A Mix of Dorky Video Gamers & Puns + Burnie Burns

smilesandvials:


This always cracks me up and I just want a giant poster of it in every lab.

smilesandvials:

This always cracks me up and I just want a giant poster of it in every lab.



sexhaver:

boredlord:

What do teens like?!? Is it memes? Memes about skeletons? Piss? Communism?

this post is 20x funnier if you imagine a CEO shouting it at his board of directors


smokecigarettesamongstthestones:

My brother says “shit happens” in response to everything

My brother was given a “shit happens” mug because of this

My brother loved his “shit happens” mug like a child

Last week, my brother dropped his “shit happens” mug

You probably know what his reaction was


gavinsgiantbritishnose:

Ryan Haywood??? nah what a loser what a— [trips] [hundreds of thousands of photos of Ryan Haywood spill out of jacket] w-what a fuckign loser i these arent mine im just [gathering them up frantically sweating] listen i just listen fuck [thousands of pictures of Ryan Haywood scatter across the floor] shit fcuk im holding them for a friend just listen


  • (I work the floor at an independently-owned menswear store. The owner, my boss, spends a lot of time at the shop, and tries to keep prices as low as possible to help our city’s large homeless population get good job interview clothes. A clearly homeless man is wandering around the store. The other patrons are giving him looks.)
  • Customer: “Excuse me, sir?”
  • Me: “Yes, ma’am?”
  • Customer: “I think you may want to call security. That… bum over there, he keeps feeling the suits and muttering to himself. I’m just sure he’s planning to steal one.”
  • Me: “Well, ma’am, I think that’s quite unlikely.”
  • Customer: “Oh, come on, you know how they are! I mean, I’d keep an eye on him even if he wasn’t homeless!”
  • (The homeless man in question happens to be Hispanic.)
  • Me: “We don’t discriminate here, ma’am.”
  • Customer: “Well, I’m sure the owner would want to hear about this!”
  • (I give in and call him over. The customer explains her concerns. As a black man, my boss isn’t happy with her racism, but agrees to talk to the homeless man.)
  • Owner: “Excuse me, sir, are you finding what you need?”
  • Homeless Man: “Well, not really. I’m hoping for something versatile in a dark or navy wool, but most of the options in my size are cut American style instead of European, which fits me a little better. Not to mention they’re all pinstriped, which I really don’t have the build for, you know?”
  • Owner: “I… yes, I understand. I think we may have some options over here, if you’ll follow me. How did you know all that?”
  • Homeless Man: “Back before I lost my job, I used to be really into this stuff. I’m not looking for anything fancy, just something I can use to look good for a job interview later today.”
  • (My boss helps him find something he likes, and comes to the counter with him. The suit is priced at $87.)
  • Homeless Man: *digging in his pockets* “Hang on, I think I’ve got enough.”
  • Owner: *to me* “Take my card. I’m buying it for him.” *to the homeless man* “Here. The suit’s yours, on one condition. After your interview today, you come back and apply for a job here too. Got it?”
  • Homeless Man: “I… oh my God, thank you. Thank you so much.”
  • (Two years later, that formerly-homeless man is my manager, and has a little girl with his new wife—the owner’s sister.)

itsstuckyinmyhead:

Best Tumblr Responses 


femmeanddangerous:

i am much gayer and nerdier than i originally budgeted for 


fuck-benedict:

fuck-benedict:

there’s a huge difference between “let people do what they choose with their bodies” and “let those 12 year olds have irresponsible sex”

its been 2 days and this has like 50k notes and i’ve only received like 5 hate messages about this u go tumblr u growin up


pizzaight:

this has gone too far

pizzaight:

this has gone too far


miles-luna:

image

the plot thickens

posted 1 day ago via bmvagaboo · © miles-luna with 1,551 notes

Track Title: Go the Distance/Defying Gravity Mashup

Artist: Kick Full

skippercifer:

its-sixteen-miles:

It’s time to try defying gravity-

               -Like a shooting star, I can go the distance-  

   -Kiss me goodbye I’m defying gravity- 

               -I will search the world, I will face its harms- 

    -I’m Flying high, I’m defying gravity-

                -I don’t care how far, I can go the distance-

    -And you won’t bring me down! And you won’t bring me down-

                                                                                 -‘Til I find my hero’s welcome right where I-

                                -And you won’t bring me…  

I forgot I had saved this- WoW what a good.


tonystarksanxieties:

kripke-is-my-king:

thevulcantimelord:

uuuhshiny:

doctorwhedonverse:

This was porn to me. 

this is porn

and then this happened

is that John Barrowman and James Marsters making out

… that is John Barrowman and James Marsers making out

(via pipdreams)



hiatus-is-killing-me:

jimmypagesunderagedgirlfriend:

a tEENAGER???… withPOLITCIAL OPINIONS?? no… politics for adults. this not affect you. go sit at kids table

(5 min later) this new generation of teenagers doesn’t care about anything besides parties and the internet